What I am afraid of...

So far the thought of being a missionary who has been called to convert the hearts of so many brings joy. But along with these joys are many fears. Of course I have the fear, if I have enough many to pay all my bills. I mean come on, right now I have enough for rent, electricity, and health insurance. Yeah where will I eat, I am still figuring that one out.

The Gospel on Sunday read: John 6:9-11 "There is a lad here who has five barley loaves and two fish; but what are they among so many?" Jesus said, "Make the people sit down." Now there was much grass in the place; so the men sat down, in number about five thousand. Jesus then took the loaves, and when he had given thanks, he distributed them to those who were seated; so also the fish, as much as they wanted. "

WITH FAITH GOD WILL PROVIDE. I will have food to eat because the Lord knows me well. As the Lord gives thanks, let us give thanks for what we have. We have so much right in our own homes.

But what I am most afraid of is missing my parents. Let's face it, I have lived a great life. My parents would do anything for my well being. My parents not only love me, but they are in love with me. Everything that love is I have seen the eyes and heart of my parents. I am growing up and I am leaving the comfort they have provided me. As much as they don't understand me at least especially now, I cannot stop but loving them. Of course, I will miss them this is normal. But I don't want to leave them. My mother says, "You are killing us by leaving." I am breaking their hearts by leaving them again.

Lord, I ask your Sacred Heart to unite my heart and theirs to Yours. May our wounded hearts find comfort in Yours, so when true suffering hits, we all will be prepared. Instead of being afraid, I give you thanks Lord for my parents.